Why Equals Make the Best Friends

Long before I heard the adage, "Equals make the best friends," I had thought about it and had come to that exact conclusion. Whether romantic, platonic or between artists, I believe there is one factor that would make two people equal in a relationship. That is security. Regardless of mutual interests, same social class or traits other than security, this factor must be present in order to develop a healthy friendshp based on equality.

Foremost, I would define security as possessing the ability to let the other person be themselves while being comfortable with one's own self. This would mean that you would be accepting of the other person's dreams, goals, skills, idiosyncrasies, general lifestyle and personality. You would respect the other person without feeling inferior or superior. The relationship could not thrive if either of the latter were present.

A secure person has no need to control his/her friend, and is not envious or needy. Again, this is true of platonic, romantic or artistic relationships. Even though art can be a competitive field, one is threatened neither by the quality of his friend's work nor the success of his career. Commonly, friends support each other.
I chose security as the determining factor because many other vital characteristics stem from this particular trait - namely trust, respect, integrity, honesty, and most importantly, self-esteem. These are all vital to a healthy friendship entered into by healthy people. While I would say that two unhealthy people could certainly have a lasting, unhealthy friendship as equals, I am not interested in discussing that type of equality......at this time.

Most of my platonic relationships have been with other women. Although like most women, I have experienced the occasional "girlfriend" who drains you with her insecurity, I feel extremely fortunate to have formed lasting friendships with women who are strong, independent, loyal and accepting of our differences.

Because of the nature of romantic relationships, where people often become enslaved by gender roles, it is not always so easy to achieve equality. Still, I have witnessed that some men are absolutely wonderfully secure in a relationship, treating their partner/friend as their equal.

Regarding relationships with other artists, I have established friendships with both men and women who are very good at what they do, have confidence in their abilities and again, recognize and accept the differences between us. However, this has not been true across the board. For the most part, I am glad to say that I view all of my artists friends as equals. Generally speaking, I am also interested in most artists' work.

Sonnet for New Books

Right now, these books, new and pure

Doctorow, Walker, Wharton and all

My ravenous eyes succumb to their allure

Pleasures anticipated within their call

Lovingly, I touch their jackets, their pages

Savoring each word, each delectable bite

With each chapter, my hunger rages

So expansive, my cerebral appetite

In them I lose myself, most concentrated

Devouring each one, feast by feast

Consuming their texts until sated

Myself becoming the books I eat

Right now, new, with their lovely spines

Once read, loved, these books become mine!

Copyright,2009,Georgette Jones

Recommended Art Book #1: Sonia Delauney, The Life of an Artist/ A Personal Biography Based on Unpublished Private Journals

Sonia Delauney was the wife of famous abstract artist, Robert Delauney. Born in Odessa in the Ukraine in 1885, she painted in a style called Orphic Cubism. Additionally, she designed costumes and dresses for commercial venues. Because she was one of the main supporters of her husband's career, she did not promote her own paintings until after his death. She finally gained recognition for her work in later years. She died in 1979 at the age of ninety-four, continuing to paint until that time.

This was one of the best biographies that I've ever read about a woman artist. I identified with Sonia because I started my own art career late - at age forty, and although I have sold hundreds of paintings, I have found the going steady, but slow. I enjoyed the book because it presented so many details about Sonia's life, and for the wonderful color plates of both her and Robert's work. There are also many black and white photos of the couple's everday life. I recommend this book to anyone who enjoys reading famous artists' biographies.

The Week in Art#2

"Objects of Affection Series"
*Note: There are seven new Haiku poems in the sidebar, as well as one sent to me by my friend, Lisa.

- Deciding to re-schedule my Open Studio Show to a later date was a tough decision, particularly since I've already put so many long hours of work into its preparation. But I'd rather do it right at a later date than do it on schedule with naggings doubts about what didn't get done. In addition to creating new work for the show, I've had to wear many hats for other tasks. Rather than complaining about who didn't follow through in helping me, suffice it to say that my favorite adage right now is, "If you want it done, do it yourself." That said, I'm feeling pretty good about my decision right now. I will post the new date once I decide when it will be.

-This week I completed two small paintings and two small collages on canvas. The latter had been in the making for a few weeks. Being a compulsive brush wielder, I find it easier to put aside a collage than a painting.

-Found a lovely Grumbacher #4 acrylic brush this week. A new brush is a wonderful thing, but mine tend to wear out fast, even the good ones.

-I love older music. Songs that helped me make it through the week: "Sultans of Swing"/Dire Straits; "My Dear Life"/Sadao Watanabe; "My Dearest Darling"/Etta James; "Dreams"/Fleetwood Mac; "Suzanne"/Nina Simone.

The Week in Art #1

- Finally, I visited a park that I had been meaning to visit all summer. Finding it so wonderful and beautiful, I returned a second time later in the week with a friend. What are those trees thinking while being guardians of the earth?

As I relished the variety of trees, unusually lush foliage and quiet river, I had a strong desire to buy a new sketchbook,returning to draw some of the imagery that captured me. Being there reinforced my feeling that a landscape artist dwells within.

- Cooking is an artistic experience for me. This week I made a lovely chicken vegetable soup to have on hand so that I won't have to bother cooking every day while painting. My impromptu recipe included boiled, chopped chicken breasts, carrots, celery, mushrooms, onions, cream of chicken soup (thinned with water), fresh tomatoes, broccoli and a sprinkling of rice. Great with a good bread, preferably a thick, multi-grain one. Very satisfying. And healthy.

- Music is essential to the art process as well as everyday life. Enjoyed while driving and while painting: "Night Time is the Right Time" / Ray Charles; "Someday My Prince Will Come" / Miles Davis; "Love Letters"/ Ketty Lester; "Lesson Learned"/ Alicia Keys; "Autumn Leaves"/ George Shearing; "Poinciana"/Ahmad Jamal

- The biggest highlights of my week were cobalt blue, payne's gray, titanium white, cobalt green and burnt sienna. Perhaps boring for some, but pleasant for me.

My Top Ten Inspirations for Creating Art

Feel free to share yours!

10. Visiting new places
9. Reading poetry
8. Viewing great cinema
7. Being in a self-conscious state of love
6. Chopping vegetables ( you heard me right).
5. Dreaming
4. Reading famous artists' biographies
3. Listening to music
2. Viewing other artists' work
1. Being in nature

Note: My article, "Discovering Your Voice by Experimenting" and images of my art are featured in the September issue of the Strathmore Artists Papers Newsletter. The publication can be viewed online in PDF format. Hope you enjoy it!

This week's featured painting, "Life Clippings #1" is an acrylic on rag painting. Rendered in a collage style, this work is meant to resemble torn papers, which in addition to my frequent imagery of cups, is a commentary about life. This painting depicts the constant states of being, sleeping and watching. It is housed in the Velma A. Walker Collection in Huntsville, Alabama through Birmingham A&M University.

Balancing Solitude and Socializing

This past week found me in the company of others almost every day, all day, both businesswise and socially. At day's end, every night last week, it seemed, I feebly struggled to paint while my body protested, "No, no! I want to rest! Give me rest, silly woman!" Being no fool and knowing I had
pushed myself too far, I quietly put myself to bed each night, wishing to sleep at least fifteen hours. But I can only do six at a stretch, ya'll.

Now, I know some folk who are definitely in their element being in a group as much as possible, but I simply am not wired that way. If I don't get regular time to be alone with myself, I become snarky, snappy and sluggish. I welcome solitude, enjoy it and am quite productive when working alone.

An introvert? Nah. Definitely an extrovert who is introspective, silly and sensitive. I love giving parties, being in crowds and conversing with new people, but there must be a balance of solitude if I am to be happy.

My solitary activities not only include sleeping, but painting (of course), thinking about painting or doing some other enjoyable activity, such as cooking, watching a good movie, listening to music or simply curling up in a chair and reflecting. When I do these things, I feel refreshed and relaxed.

I feel that we need to share our time by being in the company of others, yet we also need time to be alone with ourselves.

It's not always so easy to carve time for myself because of mundane tasks that must be completed, and because the business of being an artist sometimes demands more time than I want to give.

I am curious to hear how others balance their social lives with time spent alone, and how important is solitude to you?

Spirituality, Love and Art / Part IV

In saving the best for last in this four-part series, I chose love because it is the glue binding this particular subject matter. Yes, love is the strongest component of spirituality and art. It is both the motivation and the expression, as manifested through practice.

Strictly and quickly from my first mind, I view love as a combination of compassion, commitment and communion. Compassion because love allows you to acknowledge the feelings of others. Commitment because love is a choice we make. And communion because on the most fundamental level, love allows us to see our connection to other human beings, as well as other living things.

When I say that I cannot thrive without love, I mean it. This is why I chose at a relatively young age to do the work of developing myself spiritually - a life-long and never-arriving quest. The good news is that I get to know love by choosing to give it through my thoughts, words and deeds.

Regardless of whether a handsome, loving man is in my life, I still am able to experience love by showing it. In doing so, it is invariably reflected back to me. To family, friends, children and animals, I extend kindness, laughter and concern. No less than this, but also a deeper, passionate sexual intimacy is what I extend to a committed and romantic relationship with the man of my choosing. No less than the love shown to others, but also a different passion and intensity is what I bring to the art process.

It is true that when rendered from the heart and soul as well as the intellect, the making of art is essentially an act of love. It is the giving of one's whole self to the conception and birth of a vision. That love is returned in both the completed work and the appreciation of the viewers. This is what makes art such a satisfying pursuit, a feeling that sends artists back to the drawing board time and again.

If love was a more open and benevolent pursuit in our society, our problems would be fewer. I believe that many of the seemingly insurmountable political issues we are now facing are inter-related signals of inevitable, yet necessary change that must occur if humankind is to survive. Our disregard of nature and other human beings is disregard of our spiritual selves, our loving selves. When viewed through critical thinking, it is obvious that this disregard is the crux of every political issue we now face.

Our daily lives are more enjoyable when we practice spirituality, give love (receive) and do work we love. I have found that I am happy when I find small pleasures in life rather than obsessively seeking the "big thrill," whatever that might be. Even in the midst of doubt or worry, I now find that I am able to enjoy the pleasure of a new flower, a note from a friend or the the funny look on my cat's face when she yawns and stretches simultaneously.

In this last post of the series, I realize there is so much more I want to say on the topic. But I probably would have to write a book to do so. Basically, I feel that spirituality, love and art are inter-related and I hope my posts have adquately expressed this.

My next post: "The Balance of Solitude and Socializing"

Spitituality, Love and Art/ Part III

It has often been said that art imitates life. While this adage refers to subject matter of art relating to life, it has been my experience that the actual process of making art imitates life, particularly in the area of spritual development. The process of making art sometimes mirrors the struggle inherent in developing oneself spirititually.

I say this because, like life, the making of art is not always seamless or effortless. More often, it is about having an idea or vision and then struggling to bring that vision into being in the form in which it was conceived. This happens even when you love painting as much as I do.

Throughout the painting process, my emotions might range from joy and excitement to frustration and questioning, the same as with life. I have found this to be particularly true during the crucial last stages of striving to resolve a painting. The interaction between my technical knowledge, emotional responses, the responses of the paint itself and my brush strokes are a continuous balancing act. Any snags are most likely to occur toward the end, as I am seeking to achieve harmony of vision.

I admit that there have been times when I have painted pictures without any struggle whatsoever. But there have also been times requiring much looking and questioning, much putting aside and returning later.

In choosing to live a life of conscious spiritual development, that is, doing the internal work necessary to become a better person, I "go back to the drawing board," as it were, many times to seek answers from my higher self relative to daily life. As is often the case with art, no answers are forthcoming.

In explaining these similarities, it is not my intention to give a pat answer. There is much more that could be said on this subject. However, time and space does not permit me to expound. I will say that six months was the longest time that I've put a painting away and come back to resolve it. The solution was simple, but I needed to distance myself from the work. That particular painting won an award, by the way.

The longest time I've ever struggled to resolve a spiritual question within myself was about the same length of time as I tried to get along with a co-worker whom I disliked. Once I told myself that I had no answer, and decided to simply detach myself (politely), I realized that I had actually found the answer.

The last part of this series is about love as it relates to spirituality and art.